Our multicultural New York wedding
Jasna & Shaf
Long Island, New York
June is a very special month for me, because that’s when my husband and I got married :)
To honor our two year anniversary, I’m dedicating this month’s post to OUR wedding!
If this is your first time here, you can learn more about us through my previous post about our Paris engagement.
I promised you all the chapters of our international wedding and I’m so excited to finally share our wedding story and photos. I hope you’re ready, because there are a TON!
If you think a wedding day is a lot to take in, how about a three day Bangladeshi French American wedding!
Our wedding weekend in Long Island, New York, was full of love, colors, and multicultural celebrations.
My husband is from Bangladesh and I’m half French, so we decided to incorporate the multi-day South Asian wedding formula. Although it was ten times the amount of work to plan everything, we also had ten times the amount of fun!
And who wouldn’t want the opportunity to wear multiple wedding dresses…
The Holud
Similar to a Haldi ceremony from Indian weddings, the Holud is the day when the bride and groom traditionally wear yellow and get covered in turmeric paste (the word “holud” means “yellow” in Bangla).
This was a very exciting event as it the first time most of our family members were meeting each other! In Bangladeshi culture, the bride and groom’s sides wear different colors, and bring gifts, treats, and flowers for each other.
Many of our guests came from different parts of the world and really enjoyed the unique cultural experience of a Holud. When my husband arrived, the girls participated in a fun tradition of not allowing him in unless he paid a price to enter and meet the bride (interesting ritual, right?). Luckily, he had hundreds in crisp Bangla taka notes ready for the occasion. My bridesmaids then escorted me to him under a “Palki”, and we sat together in the adorable setup that was prepared for us.
This was our first time seeing each other all dressed up in beautiful traditional attire, and it was impossible to keep our eyes or hands off each other.
The cultural traditions continued as our guests took turns feeding us treats and covering us in turmeric paste, symbolizing their blessings for our union. As this ritual went on throughout the evening, our guests entertained us with songs and dances they had prepared for the occasion. It was such a magical and fun first day!
The Akth
The next day was our Muslim religious ceremony. This was an important ritual for our elders, so we respected their wishes. This event was more intimate with just our families and an Imam who married us.
The ceremony was pretty straightforward. Some verses were recited, my husband and I exchanged flower garlands, fed each other, and signed our marriage contract. And just like that, we were husband and wife! It felt a little surreal to think we were legally married without having said “I do”, but we knew we had another chapter left to officialize it.
After the ceremony, we went to a beach nearby to do our first photos as a married couple. We were completely relaxed and blissfully in love, the perfect recipe for a successful shoot. I mean, how gorgeous are these?!
The Wedding
After an amazing two days of vibrant Bangladeshi traditions, we brought in my French and American cultures for our official wedding day. I had been planning my wedding my entire life! I’m truly blessed to say that between all our events, all my wedding dreams came true!
My bridesmaids and I got ready together at the venue, my aunt did my hair and makeup, and my family and friends helped pull together all the details. I was so grateful for everyone’s help, as I had so many emotions I was trying to deal with. I was anxious, stressed, excited, nervous, overwhelmed…
But all those crazy feelings calmed down when I saw my husband. We did a first look, one of my favorite traditions where the bride and groom see each other for the first time before the ceremony. I have to admit this was the most special moment of the entire weekend for me! After the previous two days of rituals, families, and formalities, it was the first time we were alone and processing that “this is the person I’m marrying”. There was something profound about seeing each other on our wedding day. Out of six wedding events total (yes, I owe you two more after this!), this was the moment that I loved the most.
I also did a first look with my father, which was extremely special (I really recommend doing first looks because they’re so intimate and genuine!)
When the ceremony started, my father and my sister walked me down the aisle to my husband waiting at the altar. We had guests from over 20 different countries witnessing our union, and felt so fortunate to be surrounded by love from around the world!
Our officiant created a personalized program for us and incorporated many unique details such as inviting us to draw a portrait of each other during the ceremony. We pinky-promised while reciting our vows to each other, exchanged our rings, finally said “I do”, and happily kissed as husband and wife.
After the ceremony, our guests were invited to a cocktail hour while the rest of us did our family and bridal party photos with the beautiful backdrop of the Long Island sound.
Our reception was classy affair incorporating French and American traditions. My mother orchestrated all the decor and did such an outstanding job!
I had a first dance with the three most special men of my life: my father, my step-father, and my husband.
It felt like going through different chapters of my life. From dancing to my favorite childhood Disney song “Can you feel the love tonight” with the men who raised me, to dancing to a high school favorite “I knew I loved you” with the man I would spend my life with.
The night went on with speeches from our family members. There were many teary-eyed moments, and a lot of beautiful words were shared. I’m so glad we had a videographer to record all these moments for us!
After dinner we cut our giant cake, which my husband and I fed to each other before it got distributed to our guests.
To start the party, all the single ladies gathered behind me for the bouquet toss (the friend who caught it actually ended up being the next one to get married!). There were a few more song and dance performances, and then the dance floor opened up and was quickly packed! Our playlist was a huge success as it was full of nostalgic 80’s and 90’s gems.
To come full circle, we ended the night with a “send off” with us walking under a saree similarly to how we started our wedding weekend.
Despite three days of festivities, it all went by so fast! As with all weddings, there were things that didn’t work out and unexpected surprises, but overall it was a meaningful journey with our loved ones and memories to last a lifetime. And the best part was marrying the love of my life over and over again…
The dream team:
Wedding planner: Our mothers
Wedding venue: The Waterview
Photographers: Amber Martin & Sydney Barker
Bridal preparation: Binti’s Salon
Wedding outfits: Too many to list
In fact, most of our wedding was DIY so all the credit goes to our wonderful family and friends who made this possible!
Want to see more? Check out our wedding video by Dwayne Moore.
I hope you enjoyed reading about our wedding saga. If you have any questions or comments, I’d love to hear from you!